So much surrounds me
There is constant talk and chatter
Constant distractions that would fight for my life
Fight for my time, fight for my affections
But LORD, take Your place on the throne of my heart
LORD, take it back, the place You dwelt above all
Be the center of my universe
The Son I revolve around
Give me strength to keep my eyes
Fixed on You
When my hope is lost and the waves overtake me
You are the God who lifts me up
Let me never think it was anything in me
Oh LORD, I am a worm
I am humbled by Your grace
I cannot even lift my head
But You lift it for me so that I may gaze
On the One my soul should treasure
Monday, August 24, 2015
Treasure
Monday, August 17, 2015
Teach Me How To Pray
I feel like every time
I pray like this
I have to write things down
Because I won't remember it
Or I might not have
Another experience like this
Again
But it's just like a friendship
When you talk to someone
You both remember it
You cultivate that friendship
And build it on memories
And when I pray to You,
You remember
So Jesus, teach me how to pray
To build this friendship
This trust
This love
Sometimes I feel like a baby Christian
Because in truth I have not been
A Christian that long
When I was sixteen
I felt like I could not get closer to You
Like there was no way
I could do any more
For You
I was so hungry
For Your Word
So hungry
To serve You
But even then
Was I praying like I should?
Jesus, teach me how to pray
What is a relationship
Without communication?
What kind of relationship
Only goes one way?
When I read the Bible
That is You speaking to me
But when I pray
That is me speaking to You
And I need that
As much as anything
I know You delight
To hear from me
So teach me how to pray
I feel ashamed
That all this time
I've been a Christian
I haven't learned properly
How to pray
I haven't been comfortable
Just sitting down
Being quiet with my own thoughts
And talking to You
When in reality
It should be the easiest thing
In the world
And either my activities
Are more important
Or maybe I've just
Fed myself with so many things
That don't require
Brain activity
That I have lost
That desperate sense
Of the need to pray
So teach me the desperateness
And teach me how to pray
Let me be as comfortable
With You
As I am with any friend
Even more so
Because I don't often sit down
And talk to friends
Like I know I need
To talk to You
Teach me how to talk
And teach me how to pray
You told your disciples
How to pray
'Father in Heaven
Hallowed be You name
Your Kingdom come
Your will be done
On earth as it is in Heaven
Give us this day
Our daily bread
And forgive us our trespasses
As we forgive our those
Who have trespassed against us
And lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from evil
For Yours is the kingdom
And the power
And the glory forever'
And I've often heard
Many sermons
'Hallowed be Your name'
Is a plea that Your name
Be glorified and holy
'Your kingdom come'
And 'Your will be done'
Is asking You to do
What You are already
Going to do
What is in Your plan
Already
'On earth as it is in Heaven'
Is asking You to supersede
Human nature
And do Your will
Even as it is in done Heaven
With perfect angels
Despite the imperfections
Here on earth
'Give us this day
Our daily bread'
Is a request that
You give us
What we need
Which is far too often
What we do
Far too often...
And even beyond
Our needs, for things
We do not need
Teach me to be content
'Forgive us our trespasses
As we forgive those
Who have trespassed against us'
Is asking You to forgive
Our sins
A thing of which
I do not do
Nearly enough
And a thing of which
I need to be taught
'Lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from evil'
Is begging you to help us
In the future
With the sins we commit
Every day
And I need to do that more
'For Yours is the power
And the glory
Forever and ever'
Is giving us the reason
That we pray
Is it all to Your glory
And you have the power
To answer
So teach me how to pray
I pray like this
I have to write things down
Because I won't remember it
Or I might not have
Another experience like this
Again
But it's just like a friendship
When you talk to someone
You both remember it
You cultivate that friendship
And build it on memories
And when I pray to You,
You remember
So Jesus, teach me how to pray
To build this friendship
This trust
This love
Sometimes I feel like a baby Christian
Because in truth I have not been
A Christian that long
When I was sixteen
I felt like I could not get closer to You
Like there was no way
I could do any more
For You
I was so hungry
For Your Word
So hungry
To serve You
But even then
Was I praying like I should?
Jesus, teach me how to pray
What is a relationship
Without communication?
What kind of relationship
Only goes one way?
When I read the Bible
That is You speaking to me
But when I pray
That is me speaking to You
And I need that
As much as anything
I know You delight
To hear from me
So teach me how to pray
I feel ashamed
That all this time
I've been a Christian
I haven't learned properly
How to pray
I haven't been comfortable
Just sitting down
Being quiet with my own thoughts
And talking to You
When in reality
It should be the easiest thing
In the world
And either my activities
Are more important
Or maybe I've just
Fed myself with so many things
That don't require
Brain activity
That I have lost
That desperate sense
Of the need to pray
So teach me the desperateness
And teach me how to pray
Let me be as comfortable
With You
As I am with any friend
Even more so
Because I don't often sit down
And talk to friends
Like I know I need
To talk to You
Teach me how to talk
And teach me how to pray
You told your disciples
How to pray
'Father in Heaven
Hallowed be You name
Your Kingdom come
Your will be done
On earth as it is in Heaven
Give us this day
Our daily bread
And forgive us our trespasses
As we forgive our those
Who have trespassed against us
And lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from evil
For Yours is the kingdom
And the power
And the glory forever'
And I've often heard
Many sermons
'Hallowed be Your name'
Is a plea that Your name
Be glorified and holy
'Your kingdom come'
And 'Your will be done'
Is asking You to do
What You are already
Going to do
What is in Your plan
Already
'On earth as it is in Heaven'
Is asking You to supersede
Human nature
And do Your will
Even as it is in done Heaven
With perfect angels
Despite the imperfections
Here on earth
'Give us this day
Our daily bread'
Is a request that
You give us
What we need
Which is far too often
What we do
Far too often...
And even beyond
Our needs, for things
We do not need
Teach me to be content
'Forgive us our trespasses
As we forgive those
Who have trespassed against us'
Is asking You to forgive
Our sins
A thing of which
I do not do
Nearly enough
And a thing of which
I need to be taught
'Lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from evil'
Is begging you to help us
In the future
With the sins we commit
Every day
And I need to do that more
'For Yours is the power
And the glory
Forever and ever'
Is giving us the reason
That we pray
Is it all to Your glory
And you have the power
To answer
So teach me how to pray
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
The God Who Takes Care of Me
I wrote this in Uganda when I was reading through Romans.
Romans 5:1-5 We have been justified through faith. We have peace with God. Hope does not disappoint, Christ died for me when I was still POWERLESS.
Against all human reasoning
You are the God who answers prayer
Against all possible reality
You gave Abraham a son
And not only one
But a multitude
He trusted in You
You did what You said you'd do
And his faith
Was counted to him as righteousness
Do I believe?
Do I believe like Abraham did?
Do I believe
That You can answer my prayers
And will?
You saved me when I was helpless
You rescued me when I was lost
In my powerlessness
You answered my unspoken call
If you answer before I ask
Will you not also answer my unspoken pleas?
If you give before I ask
Will you not also take care of me?
You are good
Let me never forget it
You're my Father
Let me always remember
And with Your power
You always take good care of me
Romans 5:1-5 We have been justified through faith. We have peace with God. Hope does not disappoint, Christ died for me when I was still POWERLESS.
Against all human reasoning
You are the God who answers prayer
Against all possible reality
You gave Abraham a son
And not only one
But a multitude
He trusted in You
You did what You said you'd do
And his faith
Was counted to him as righteousness
Do I believe?
Do I believe like Abraham did?
Do I believe
That You can answer my prayers
And will?
You saved me when I was helpless
You rescued me when I was lost
In my powerlessness
You answered my unspoken call
If you answer before I ask
Will you not also answer my unspoken pleas?
If you give before I ask
Will you not also take care of me?
You are good
Let me never forget it
You're my Father
Let me always remember
And with Your power
You always take good care of me
Monday, August 3, 2015
Well, Back to Normal Life... Or Is It?
I believe that every mission trip should have a goal, something you work towards while you are away from home. But what about after you get back from the mission field?
I've been on several mission trips, and after every one, I've felt empty and alone. Why is that? I think it's because, sure, there may have been a goal I set while I was on the trip, but it wasn't an open-ended goal. It was a goal I set for 10 days, two weeks, two months... It didn't go beyond that. So when I came back, I felt like I had left my purpose behind. My goal was a short-sighted one.
I got excited to serve Jesus while I was overseas, and I set a goal to help me keep my eyes on the prize. But I did not plan what I would do when I got home.
There's something wrong with that.
My goal for Uganda in the first month was to be more selfless, to give of myself and serve, as Jesus did, in any way I could. This could look like doing the dishes after a meal, sweeping the dirty kitchen floor, or just doing the jobs I was given every day on the construction team with a cheerful attitude. I did not always make my goal, I admit, especially having that cheerful attitude. But those days I did were some of the best, fulfilling ones.
As time progressed, I added on to my goal. I was reading through Romans during the trip, and many things stuck out to me. In chapter 13 verse 8, Paul is talking about love. He says, "Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law." I wrote it on my arm and kept looking back on it for several days afterwards because it really struck me. We have been loved. We have a debt we owe to Jesus. Therefore, we owe it to others to show them that same kind of love. And that involves living in harmony with others, as it mentioned in the chapter before. I made it my goal to do whatever it took to live in harmony and to show love, even when, and especially when, it wasn't being shown back.
This was the hardest goal because there was one person that seemed to really have it out for me. It is emotionally draining to keep turning the other cheek and responding in love... But it made me rely on God all the more as I constantly had to keep coming to him when my strength and determination ran out. It took what seemed like forever, but I eventually saw the results of that love come back as God worked in their heart and they even came to me and apologized for everything.
God really blessed those goals, and let me see the results even while I was there! But what about now?
Does it make sense to come back home and mope because I feel like I don't have a purpose anymore, like I left my purpose behind me when I left Africa?
Not at all.
I still have a sphere of influence here. I come in contact with people every day, even if it's just my family. Why can I not continue striving toward those goals, and as new challenges arise make new ones?
Yesterday, I went to Prayer Mountain to get away from everything and have time alone with God. Although it was hot outside and my body longed for water, the thirst in my soul was being quenched.
I re-listened to a sermon by Francis Chan about being on fire for Jesus and read the book of Joel as I watched the sun set and the the Prairie lights start to come out. Later, I watched a sermon by Matt Chandler about becoming more mature as a Christian.
In the sermon about being on fire for Jesus, Francis Chan talked about the church in Laodecia in Revelation and how they were lukewarm. He said that most people are casual about God because they have a casual picture of Him. He listed some things that can feed that casual picture of God, as I wrote down my own list.
In the book of Joel, I read about the destruction that came upon Israel because they would not repent of their sins. And yet, there was grace. Joel 2:12-14 " 'Even now, ' declares the LORD, 'return to me with all your heart, with fasting and weeping and mourning.' Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the LORD your God, for He is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love , and he relents from sending calamity. Who knows? He may turn and relent and leave behind a blessing..."
In the sermon on maturity, the thing Chandler kept emphasizing was getting our eyes on Jesus and putting to death the old self and its ways. He told some things that he personally could not follow too closely or they would keep him from following the Master too closely and rob him of affection for Him. Again, I made my own list.
While I was listening to the sermons and reading, I did not see it, but looking back I see a common denominator in all of them -- do whatever it takes to get closer to Jesus, to see Him for who He truly is, take the veil off my eyes and get rid of anything that would cloud my vision of His glory. Even now, He waits for me to do just that, get rid of all these little trinkets and run after the great Treasure!
Perhaps, before anything else, this should be my goal. Everything else depends on it.
I cannot leave the mission field and think that I can somehow go home and rest. How will I be able to be a missionary overseas if I am easy on myself here? The truth of the matter is, home is the hardest mission field, and it is perhaps the most important because this is the training ground.
I now have three goals: be selfless, love unhindered, and above all, "throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles" (Heb. 12:1). The last comes first. How can I give others an accurate picture of God if there are things clouding my own image of God?
This is no longer business as usual. We are at war,
and we are on a mission.
I've been on several mission trips, and after every one, I've felt empty and alone. Why is that? I think it's because, sure, there may have been a goal I set while I was on the trip, but it wasn't an open-ended goal. It was a goal I set for 10 days, two weeks, two months... It didn't go beyond that. So when I came back, I felt like I had left my purpose behind. My goal was a short-sighted one.
I got excited to serve Jesus while I was overseas, and I set a goal to help me keep my eyes on the prize. But I did not plan what I would do when I got home.
There's something wrong with that.
My goal for Uganda in the first month was to be more selfless, to give of myself and serve, as Jesus did, in any way I could. This could look like doing the dishes after a meal, sweeping the dirty kitchen floor, or just doing the jobs I was given every day on the construction team with a cheerful attitude. I did not always make my goal, I admit, especially having that cheerful attitude. But those days I did were some of the best, fulfilling ones.
As time progressed, I added on to my goal. I was reading through Romans during the trip, and many things stuck out to me. In chapter 13 verse 8, Paul is talking about love. He says, "Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law." I wrote it on my arm and kept looking back on it for several days afterwards because it really struck me. We have been loved. We have a debt we owe to Jesus. Therefore, we owe it to others to show them that same kind of love. And that involves living in harmony with others, as it mentioned in the chapter before. I made it my goal to do whatever it took to live in harmony and to show love, even when, and especially when, it wasn't being shown back.
This was the hardest goal because there was one person that seemed to really have it out for me. It is emotionally draining to keep turning the other cheek and responding in love... But it made me rely on God all the more as I constantly had to keep coming to him when my strength and determination ran out. It took what seemed like forever, but I eventually saw the results of that love come back as God worked in their heart and they even came to me and apologized for everything.
God really blessed those goals, and let me see the results even while I was there! But what about now?
Does it make sense to come back home and mope because I feel like I don't have a purpose anymore, like I left my purpose behind me when I left Africa?
Not at all.
I still have a sphere of influence here. I come in contact with people every day, even if it's just my family. Why can I not continue striving toward those goals, and as new challenges arise make new ones?
Yesterday, I went to Prayer Mountain to get away from everything and have time alone with God. Although it was hot outside and my body longed for water, the thirst in my soul was being quenched.
I re-listened to a sermon by Francis Chan about being on fire for Jesus and read the book of Joel as I watched the sun set and the the Prairie lights start to come out. Later, I watched a sermon by Matt Chandler about becoming more mature as a Christian.
In the sermon about being on fire for Jesus, Francis Chan talked about the church in Laodecia in Revelation and how they were lukewarm. He said that most people are casual about God because they have a casual picture of Him. He listed some things that can feed that casual picture of God, as I wrote down my own list.
In the book of Joel, I read about the destruction that came upon Israel because they would not repent of their sins. And yet, there was grace. Joel 2:12-14 " 'Even now, ' declares the LORD, 'return to me with all your heart, with fasting and weeping and mourning.' Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the LORD your God, for He is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love , and he relents from sending calamity. Who knows? He may turn and relent and leave behind a blessing..."
In the sermon on maturity, the thing Chandler kept emphasizing was getting our eyes on Jesus and putting to death the old self and its ways. He told some things that he personally could not follow too closely or they would keep him from following the Master too closely and rob him of affection for Him. Again, I made my own list.
While I was listening to the sermons and reading, I did not see it, but looking back I see a common denominator in all of them -- do whatever it takes to get closer to Jesus, to see Him for who He truly is, take the veil off my eyes and get rid of anything that would cloud my vision of His glory. Even now, He waits for me to do just that, get rid of all these little trinkets and run after the great Treasure!
Perhaps, before anything else, this should be my goal. Everything else depends on it.
I cannot leave the mission field and think that I can somehow go home and rest. How will I be able to be a missionary overseas if I am easy on myself here? The truth of the matter is, home is the hardest mission field, and it is perhaps the most important because this is the training ground.
I now have three goals: be selfless, love unhindered, and above all, "throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles" (Heb. 12:1). The last comes first. How can I give others an accurate picture of God if there are things clouding my own image of God?
This is no longer business as usual. We are at war,
and we are on a mission.
 |
| You are now entering the mission field. |
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