Severe Blessing

You were the first who let me see
There could be someone else,
You gave me a window into the potential
But now, how can I put you to rest?

He has given me a gift in you
A gift of a brother
But I feel so ungrateful
Because that is not the gift I wanted
Oh, friend. You are a severe blessing to me

I watch you and I see your heart
One that He has broken to make it beautiful
And I love the beautiful that He has made
You challenge me to live and love well
I could follow someone like you to forever

Now when I see you I know I can only think
Of what I could not gain that I have already lost
And you don't know what you do to me
But it is something I can never divulge
Oh, friend. You are a severe blessing to me

How do I grieve what I have not had?
And yet, I feel the need to grieve you
Though I have not lost our friendship
I have lost the hope that I put into its future

Were you another crutch I put my hope in?
Another thing in which I found joy?
And now God takes you away to show me He is all I need
I pray that you can glorify God with her
Or this too could be a lesson I am learning at your expense

You are such a good friend
I did not have a category for someone so nice
I had so many assumptions
And began to believe attractive lies
Oh, friend. You are a severe blessing to me

Please, I am fragile; just be gentle
My heart can't take too much of you
Please, I am weak; don't care so much
I will pray from afar and learn to love differently

The creation that is you
Is one that God called good and His
He has a plan for you that is for your good
If that plan is with someone else
He still does not withhold good from me

Oh, friend. Though you know it not
You are a severe blessing to me